Tag: mental health

Seeking A Life of Simplicity

What does it mean to simplify? Consuming natural foods? Downsizing your possessions? Saying no to those who make demands on your time? All of these actions can contribute to less stress, better health, and greater happiness.

Throughout history many writers and teachers have voiced the importance of living simply. The ancient Greek philosopher Democritus (460-370 B.C.) wrote “Let your occupations be few, if you would lead a tranquil life.” Jesus taught that we should trust God and not get caught up in the busyness of life. Thoreau believed spending time in nature is the key to a life with less anxiety. By listening to all of these different voices, we can conclude that living simply is the way to find peace, happiness, and a closer relationship with God.

I’m sure we can all remember simpler times in our lives. As children, we occupied ourselves with play and our worries were few. We relied upon our parents to meet most of our needs. Later life became more complicated when we joined the workforce in order to make a living. Even so, the technological advances of the past fifty years made our jobs easier, not more difficult.

Today’s modern conveniences make it possible to spend less time on household chores compared to our parents and grandparents. One would think we would be the most contented people who ever lived. Instead many of us feel frazzled and exhausted from trying to keep up with our busy calendar. Could it be that we have too many choices to make regarding how to spend our free time?

When I retired from teaching I felt unmoored. I needed to do something meaningful to fill my day. Once I expressed my feelings to a friend. He said, “There are many things you could do, but only pursue one thing.” At the time I’m not sure he was aware of the significance of his words. His suggestion opened my eyes to the truth about myself. I wanted to write, and I’ve been writing ever since. Hence, the founding of this blog in 2016.

Now I live in a retirement community and I am surprised at the schedule of activities which are offered. We have fitness classes, trips, chef’s demos, lectures, drop-in-bridge, ice cream socials, and shuffleboard! Yet, here I am— sitting at my laptop, banging on the keys.

But I am as happy as a clam because I’ve said yes to the “one thing.”

If you feel pulled in many directions and can’t seem to find a moment’s peace, stop and ask yourself, “How can I best spend my time in a way that brings purpose to my life and also encourages others?”

Then start doing it!

The Allure of “Alone”

My favorite television program is “Alone.” If you’ve never seen it, ten individuals compete in a contest for a prize of $500,000. Each contestant camps alone on a tract of land. The object of the contest is to survive living in the wilderness by relying on their own skills. Most of the programs I’ve watched take place in northern Canada during the late fall and winter. The contestants are permitted to bring ten items which can be used to construct shelter and procure food. Every contender is supplied with cameras to film their experiences.

I like the show because the producers choose beautiful wild settings for the contest. As a viewer, and someone who enjoys the outdoors, I feel drawn into their world when I hear the rustle of leaves and rippling water. I imagine the fragrance of the pines and the smoke of the campfire.

Each episode follows the various characters through their struggle to survive. Some people decide to build a shelter right away while others decide finding food is their first priority. Each setting includes access to a lake. In order to insure it is free from bacteria, the water must be boiled.

Contestants collect edible plants, fish, and hunt for food with primitive tools. Guns are not permitted. After a successful catch or kill, the meat is sometimes stored for future use. This too, is a challenge, since food caches draw scavengers like pine martins, bears, and wolves. The contest is not only among contestants, but with nature itself.

Anytime during the contest a participant can “tap out” by using a special phone. Some contestants tap out after a few days due to injury or illness. Gastro-intestinal issues are common when a person eats something deadly. I would not enjoy eating some of the animals the contestants eat. But if you’re hungry, anything’s game! The last man or woman standing earns the prize money. I have watched episodes where the winner of the contest survived for 80 days.

The real test for every contestant is overcoming loneliness. Everyone misses their family members. Some contestants focus on winning the money and how they plan to spend it. This goal keeps them going for awhile, but loneliness eventually consumes even the most introverted person. Some contestants have created dolls and statues to talk to. Everyone talks to the camera, because eventually the show will be produced and their loved ones will watch. The contestants pretend they are actually talking to someone—but no one talks back.

One contender remarked that that he understood why prisons use solitary confinement to punish people. It is difficult to be alone with your own thoughts and stay positive. Love is a force which empowers humans to live. Relationships change our objective from physical survival to living for a higher purpose. In addition, working cooperatively can accomplish more in less time.

The author of Ecclesiastes speaks to the benefit of friendship. “Two are better than one, because they have good return for their work. If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls down and has no one to help him up.” Eccl. 4:9 NIV

The contestants on “Alone” are allured by an idea of rugged individualism. But each season of the show teaches the same lesson. People need people. The program makes me appreciate the life I live, and my relationships which make life meaningful.

When I compare my outdoor skills with these survival experts I know I wouldn’t stand a chance of lasting more than one night. What would you miss most?

Are You a Hugger?

If your answer is “YES,” I’m sure the past ten months have been difficult. Social distancing has made hugging a no-no.

I didn’t realize how much I miss hugging until I heard January 21 is National Hugging Day. Maybe that’s the problem in America lately. We need more love.

I hope you have someone within your circle of relationships you feel comfortable hugging. Did you know wrapping your arms around someone for twenty seconds releases a feel good hormone called oxytocin? Oxytocin is beneficial to our mental and physical health.

Hugging helps us by:

  • improving our sleep
  • reducing pain
  • reducing stress
  • lowering blood pressure
  • lowering the risk of heart disease
  • easing anxiety

In addition, people who enjoy more affectionate relationships are less likely to get sick!

Granted, many of us might not feel comfortable with a twenty second hug. (Personally, I’ve never timed my hugs.) A twenty second hug seems more appropriate for close relationships. At a time when handshakes are off limits, hugging anyone outside of our immediate family could be a social faux-pas.

Embracing our family members is important during these troubled and lonely times. When children see their parents embrace, they feel safe and secure. When children and teens receive hugs from their parents, they feel loved. Hugs encourage us in the midst of challenges, bolster our self esteem, and communicate support when words seem empty.

How many hugs a day do you give? How many do you receive? Virginia Satir was a pioneer in family therapy. She believed you can never receive too many hugs and families suffer when physical touch is absent from our interaction.

This is a short post about a simple action. Hugging is free and our supply is unlimited.

Have you hugged your loved ones today?

Thanks to Donna and Geren Baird for modeling the art of hugging.