blog

The Balance-Happiness Illusion

Balanced Rock is a great example of equilibrium in nature. The boulder looks like it could fall at any moment, and someday erosion will force it to topple. Until then, it stands as a scenic wonder located in Garden of the Gods near Colorado Springs. Balanced Rock required perfect geologic and weather conditions to achieve its balance. In the same way, people often go to great lengths to achieve balance in their lives. We try to balance our finances, our diets, and the never ending work-play struggle. But is balance ever possible? And beyond that, is balance necessary to our happiness?

I’ve thought a lot about balance lately. After my foot surgery five weeks ago, my activities drastically changed. My doctor ordered me to not put any weight on the ball of my left foot for three weeks. I used a walker and managed to balance on my right foot to walk to the bathroom. I spent most of my days and nights on the sofa.

Resting was difficult. I’m not by any means a “couch potato.” At first I dreaded so much inactivity. Then I began to see what a wonderful opportunity this time of recovery brought me. How often have I wished for more time to pursue my passions? I passed the hours by reading, writing, and praying. I was completely out of balance, yet completely happy.

Our desire for balance comes from our desire to control our lives.

Are you a time management freak? We all have twenty-four hours in our day, and follow some kind of routine. We can make plans, but interruptions arise, throwing us off balance. These interruptions remind us we don’t have control of our time after all. I admire people who can go with the flow of events. They are usually calmer, happier people.

Instead of desiring balance, identify personal priorities.

Do you exhaust yourself trying to balance your own needs and the needs of others? Narrow your demands on yourself and your time. Pray and make a list of your priorities. God knows you. He knows your abilities, and he knows the needs of those in your sphere of influence. Before you commit to anything new, evaluate it according to your priorities. Be accepting of what you can and cannot do. Be accepting of other people and their priorities. You will be a lot happier.

Re-think the social media energy drain.

When I made a list of my priorities, I reflected upon the amount of time I spend on social media sites. I realized I have an addiction. Any time I have a few spare minutes at my disposal, I start logging onto facebook, twitter, or instagram. Beginning writers are told they must increase their online presence in order to succeed. Spending time interacting on social media is a never ending cycle that always demands more energy. Energy that might be better spent in face to face relationships.

Respect life’s seasons.

Nature’s four seasons were created for the purpose of growth and rest. All of us have seasons in our life when we are more focused on one goal or another. It’s important to recognize when one season ends and a new one begins. Each season brings new opportunities for growth, outwardly and inwardly. When we relax and submit to God’s will for the season we’re in, all striving ceases. For writers, there are times of creativity, and other times to seek inspiration. You might feel like you’re out of balance, but you’re right where you need to be.

The Book of Ecclesiastes offers wisdom about life and balance.

“I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live. That every man can eat and drink and find satisfaction in all his toil—this is the gift of God.” —King Solomon

What are your thoughts on balance and happiness? Does happiness depend upon achieving balance? Leave a comment.

When Airline Travel Goes Wrong

We thought we had it made. With boarding passes in hand and luggage stowed, Herb and I relaxed at the Orlando (MCO) airport in plenty of time to board our flight. The sunny skies confirmed we had good weather for flying. Our itinerary included traveling to Newark, New Jersey from Orlando. Once in Newark, we would embark on a night flight to London.

Herb thought of everything. He even reserved seats with extra leg space on the flight to London to ensure our comfort. We planned to sleep on the plane and arrive rested and ready to see a few sights in London before meeting our Viking tour group.

Then we heard an announcement. “The three p.m. flight to Newark is delayed. Liberty International is closed due to storms. Stay tuned for more information.” An hour went by. I tried to occupy my mind with a crossword puzzle. The four p.m. announcement repeated the same information.

Herb began to pace the airport like a caged tiger. “Looks like we’re going to miss our connection to London.” I continued to focus on my crossword puzzle and hope for the best.

Finally at five p.m. the staff started boarding procedures. The plane taxied out of the gate. Then the captain announced, “Ladies and gentlemen, I’m sorry—Newark is not allowing any planes to land. The storm has gotten worse. We will need to go back to the gate. I promise to update you in an hour.”

So we sat. And we sat. True to his word, at six-thirty the captain told us nothing changed. People were starting to panic. Word had spread there were two dogs stowed in the baggage section of the plane. In ninety-degree heat with no water, how would the animals survive?

Soon the captain announced anyone who wanted to exit to plane, could do so. Someone was going to take the dogs out of the hold and give them water. Whew! The passengers cheered.

We remained in our seats. At this point I didn’t want to be left behind if the plane departed. I also didn’t want to join the number of passengers who might delay our flight any longer with their goings and comings. I began to regret my decision when the person next to me returned with a pizza. The protein bar I ate a couple of hours ago couldn’t compete with the aroma. My stomach churned from hunger and anxiety.

Finally, at eight p.m. we were cleared for Newark. Herb and I knew we were doomed. What would happen when we arrived? Our future hung in the balance.

Finally at eleven p.m. we landed in Newark. We rushed to our connecting gate, only to discover our flight to London took off about fifteen minutes prior to our arrival. We were told to go to customer service to find out what to do next.

Tired and disappointed, we joined the line with other disgruntled customers. When our turn came, we pleaded our case to the attendant behind the desk. After checking her computer she said, “Well, it looks like you might be able to fly stand-by to London first thing in the morning at eight o’clock. You will need to board at seven. “

“What do we do until then?” Herb asked.

“You can take a taxi to a hotel for the night. But you will need to collect your luggage from baggage claim and recheck it in the morning.” she responded.

Herb and I moved away from the counter to discuss our options. We got back in line until it was our turn to speak to the attendant again.

“We’ve decided to stay here. We don’t want to be late in case we can board the early flight. Do you have any pillows or blankets?” Herb asked.

The attendant stepped into a side closet and returned with two blankets. (The same super thin kind they give out on planes.) She didn’t produce any pillows.

Herb decided to buy a neck pillow from a self-serve vendor. We took the blankets and our carry-on luggage to the only piece of carpeted floor we could find. A few other wretched souls were curled up across from us.

“Goodnight, Herb.” I tried to get comfortable by resting my head on top of my purse. It didn’t work. Sleep eluded me. Blame it on the glaring ceiling lights. Blame it on the incessant droning of airport “techno” music. Blame it on the guy talking on the phone a few feet away. On top of all this, I couldn’t get warm. Every time I looked at Herb his eyes were closed and I thought I better stay quiet.

About five a.m. the activity in the airport picked up. A stream of passengers with early flights rolled by our “bedroom.” Herb and I picked up our blankets and stumbled off to find coffee and breakfast.

After breakfast, we checked in with the receptionist at our new gate and took our seats in the waiting area. Finally after another hour of anxious waiting our names were called! We had seats on the next flight to London. Is this what it might feel like when God looks in his “book of names” for entry to heaven? We were elated.

Eight more hours of flying and a five hour time difference put us at London Heathrow airport around eight p.m. Twenty-seven hours had passed from when we set foot in the Orlando airport. We made it, but of course our luggage did not. This was a perfect example of what can go wrong, did go wrong.

What did this experience teach me? What are the lessons I learned?

“Traveling is brutality. It forces you to trust strangers and lose sight of the familiar comforts of home. You are constantly off balance.” —James Michner.

This quote rings true with me. Traveling can be brutal. No matter how carefully a person plans, forces beyond his control can change everything. Do you agree? Leave a comment. I also welcome any travel tips you may want to offer.

Tribute to Claude Monet

Every day you create, you touch something beyond yourself.

How much effort are you willing to put forth to pursue your artistic vision? Would you move to a new location? Divert a stream? Build a pond? Plant a garden? The founder of impressionism, Claude Monet did all of these things to create an environment for painting.

Most creatives find places to go for inspiration, few construct that place. This summer I visited Monet’s garden in Giverny, France, located west of Paris. Monet came to Giverny in 1883 where he lived and painted until his death in 1926. Alongside his property, he had a pond built taking water from a branch of the Epte River, a tributary of the Seine. His famous “Water Lilies” paintings were inspired by this pond. Click the link to view.

A view of the Lily Pond with the Japanese bridge in the distance.

Worth the Effort

Under Monet’s direction, a small army of gardeners, planted an exotic collection of weeping willows, bamboo trees, and flowers. He often referred to his garden as his “finest masterpiece.” But Monet wasn’t only interested in the plants around the pond, he obsessed with the pond itself. He studied the effects of light on the water at all times of the day and during every season. He painted 250 oil paintings of water landscapes. Any representation of sky or land is shown as a reflection in these works.

Up close and personal with a water lily.

Not Without Critics

Every cutting edge creative has a few critics, of course. The question is, “Do you allow yourself and your art to be hampered by the opinion of others?” When the local authorities learned that Monet had imported his water lilies from Egypt and South America, they demanded he uproot the plants before they poisoned the water system. Monet simply ignored them. As time went on, his paintings became more abstract, challenging the conventions of Parisian art in the modern age. This disturbed many patrons who normally commissioned artists to paint realistically. Their comments did not deter Monet from expressing himself.

No Stranger to Hardship

Do you give up when the going gets tough? At the age of 82 Monet discovered he had cataracts. The deterioration of his eyesight terrorized him. Still he continued to paint, determined to create what he saw. He painted the Japanese Bridge in fiery shades of yellow and red. Click here and scroll down to view a painting that expresses the emotions of Monet at this time.

A Bigger Reach

Monet pioneered the idea that artists could express themselves as individuals. Looking back we can appreciate the contribution he made to the art world, changing it forever. No artist can know how their work might be viewed historically. Every day you create you touch something beyond yourself.

In the garden.

Bletchley Park : Britain’s Best Kept Secret

Can you keep a secret? In today’s social media culture, many people can’t. Try to imagine not discussing any information about your work with fellow employees and immediate family members for thirty years.

Welcome back to my D-Day Anniversary Tour. This summer my husband and I took a Viking Cruise which included Normandy, Paris, and London. I was impressed by our time spent at Bletchley Park, located outside of London in Buckinghamshire. The estate was the home of Sir Herbert Leon until 1938. Then it became one of the most important centers of British intelligence during World War Two.

“The greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places.”—Arnold Dahl

The British government purchased the serene fifty-five acre country estate because it afforded privacy and security. Nearby transport links to Oxford and Cambridge connected the estate to academia. Bletchley Park had its own power and water supply which guaranteed safe drinking water at all times.

No one in the surrounding community knew what was really going on at Bletchley. High chain link fences were erected around the perimeter. Neighbors thought it was a lunatic asylum. This impression was reinforced at the local pub, where brilliant and somewhat eccentric codebreakers spoke to each other in Ancient Greek. Ordinary folk who lived around the secret base were baffled by the unusual people in their midst.

Why so Secret?

The mission of Bletchley was to intercept, translate, and decrypt German communications and notify Allied troops of Nazi battle plans. Any breech of information that might get back to the Nazi’s would be disastrous. At the peak of its operation nine thousand employees worked here. All of them were asked to sign the Official Secrets Act of Britain. The penalty for careless talk could warrant imprisonment. Signs like the one posted below encouraged workers to not talk about their work. This pact of secrecy was enforced until the mid 1970’s.

A reminder to the Bletchley workers to not share information.

Of course not all nine thousand employees worked in the beautiful Bletchley mansion. Huts were erected on the property where most of the codebreaking occurred. The huts were dark and hot inside. All windows were covered with black blinds to keep staff from knowing what work was being done inside the neighboring hut. German messages were passed from one hut to another via a makeshift wooden tunnel.

After a ten year restoration project, the huts were opened to the public in 2004. No photographs existed of the buildings. All were restored by volunteers advised by veterans who worked here.

Cracking the Nazi Codes

Nazi communications were written using the Enigma. This machine looked like a typewriter except it substituted one letter for another creating an encrypted message. When an encrypted message was received by another Enigma, the operator would retype the gibberish and decode the actual message. A British mathematician at Bletchley, Alan Turing invented the Bombe, a machine that cracked the encrypted Nazi’s codes, and speeded up the process.

A replica of a Bombe machine.

Several Bombes were located in Hut 11 and were operated by members of the Women’s Royal Navy Service. (WRNS) The women worked eight hour shifts six days a week . Many of them were young, in their late teens and early twenties. The work was noisy as the rows of drums revolved. The smell of hot oil emanated from these machines. The women had little or no understanding of the importance of their work, but knew they had to keep each machine running. The Bombes of Hut 11 enabled the decrypting of three thousand German messages a day. Throughout the war and for years afterwards the women kept their contract of secrecy.

The work performed at Bletchley Park is thought to have shortened the length of the Second World War by two years. Winston Churchill thanked the (WRENS) for “laying the golden eggs without clucking.”

Our Viking Cruise through Normandy

“A great way to learn about your country is to leave it.” —Henry Rollins

Bonjour mes ami! This summer I learned how much the French people appreciate politeness. Did you know it’s considered rude to ask a direct question without first speaking a proper greeting? This is just one of the many tips I picked up from one of our Viking excursion guides. No wonder so many Americans, myself included, tend to get off on the wrong foot as tourists.

Yes, in some places, Americans are considered uncultured, rude, and self-centered. However, I discovered the people of Normandy are willing to overlook our faults. Many of them remember the D-Day Invasion of 1944. During our visit to Normandy I appreciated being greeted by scores of American flags. I saw flags displayed outside homes, on fences, or strung from rooftops across city streets. Our Viking cruise focused on the 75th anniversary of D-Day. In this post I will share how beautifully the Viking staff developed this theme through excursions and onboard lectures.

Our Excursions

My husband and I boarded our Viking longboat outside of Paris on June 4. We cruised on the meandering Seine River until we disembarked at Rouen. Then we traveled by bus to the American landing sites of Point du Hoc, Utah Beach, and Omaha Beach. Thousands of Allied ships comprised the largest amphibious invasion in history, known as “Operation Overlord.” In the wee hours of the morning on June 6, 1944 wave after wave of troops were cut down by German defenses perched high on the cliffs above Omaha beach. However, a few American soldiers managed to scale the cliffs shown below and by the end of the day an 80 mile stretch of land along the Atlantic coast had been breached by the Allies.

Two thousand American soldiers lost their lives at Omaha Beach on June 6, 1944. Nazi gun embankments controlled the high cliffs above the water.

Today a beautiful memorial rises out of the water to symbolize the courage of the American soldiers who sacrificed their lives to liberate France. “Les Braves” was created by Anilore Banon and presented as a gift from the French people on the 60th anniversary of D-Day.

“Les Braves”

The sculpture represents three elements: The Wings of Hope and the Wings of Fraternity stand on either side. The center of the work is called Rise, Freedom and inspires the world to stand strong against all forms of inhumanity.

Onboard Lectures

Our program director expanded the travel experience by inviting local guests on board to speak. While we were docked in Vernon, Monsier Castreau shared his memories of living in Vernon as a teenager. He experienced first hand the horrors of the Nazi invasion, the Nazi occupation of his community, and the eventual liberation by Americans. He remembers feeling hungry because the Nazi army ate most of what food was available. Monsier Castreau expressed his heartfelt appreciation for America. There wasn’t a dry eye in the audience, many of whom were the sons and daughters of American soldiers who fought in France during the war.

I was honored to meet Monsier Castreau, who experienced life under the Nazi occupation of France.

Further upstream, at La Roche Guyon, we heard a presentation by Magali Clemencon, author and lecturer. Magali’s grandfather was a member of the French Resistance. Magali has interviewed and documented the testimony of 24 survivors of the Montluc prison, where the Nazi’s housed anyone deemed “undesirable,” like members of the Resistance, Jews, and Gypsies.

Author Magali Clemencon

Magali made a comment I will never forget. “It takes forty years for anyone who has experienced a deeply tragic event to be able to talk about it.” She shared that many survivors of World War II were unable to talk about their experiences with their children. For some, they could only speak about their past a few years prior to their death. Those who committed heroic deeds all say the same thing, “I only did what anyone in my position would do.”

I hate to imagine what the world might look like today if it were not for ordinary people doing extraordinary things. These special guests made history come alive to me. Through the eyes of strangers I came to know America in a different light and I gained a better understanding of my country’s contribution to freedom.This 4th of July take a few moments to reflect upon the freedoms we enjoy and the sacrifices of those who made it possible.

Utah Beach

In closing, I wish to thank Lionel Auber, our Viking Program Director who coordinated all excursions and onboard activities.

Many thanks to Lionel Auber for a memorable travel experience.

Our Free Day in Paris

“Repetition doesn’t create memories, new experiences do.” —Brian Chesky

Herb and I turned the faded pages of an old photo album with pictures from our trip to Europe in 1979. I pointed to a picture taken in Paris. “Look at us. We were just kids then. It’s hard to believe we backpacked through Europe for six weeks. We were brave.”

Herb nodded. “Let’s visit some of these places when we go to France next month. Most of our time is scheduled with Viking excursions but I’m sure we can arrange to have one free day.”

Earlier this year we booked a Viking River Cruise to visit the D-Day landing sites on the beaches of Normandy. This would be our first trip abroad in forty years and I was unsure of what to pack.

“I’m wearing the same sweater and jeans in most of these pictures,” I laughed. “I must have thrown them away when we came home. All of my clothes had to fit in one backpack. Now I’m having a hard time limiting myself to one suitcase.”

We talked about how different everything was in 1979. Forty years ago we didn’t have cell phones, navigation systems, or digital cameras. We used film to take photos. As newly weds, our tight budget constrained us. Whether or not to buy another roll of film was a big decision.

We pulled out our map of Paris and made a list of three places we wanted to revisit. I couldn’t wait to go. Everything fell into place and we selected June 5 as our special day to travel in our personal time machine to the year 1979.

Notre Dame Cathedral

Notre Dame, 1979
Notre Dame, June 5, 2019

From this angle the iconic belfry towers look almost as they did in 1979. The church is under a huge reconstruction project as a result of the terrible fire in April. The entire area nearby the church was closed. The rainy weather added to the despair of the scene. For the latest on the reconstruction effort click here.

Luxembourg Gardens

Luxembourg Gardens 2019

On September 17, 1979 we celebrated our second wedding anniversary by getting dressed up and asking a bystander to take our picture. Herb must have carried his tie in his backpack. We didn’t see much of the gardens this year since we were in a hurry to meet our shuttle back to the Seine River to meet our Viking longboat. After snapping the shot on the right, we darted away to our third stop.

Hotel Gay-Lusac

We stayed here in 1979 because of the hotel’s proximity to Luxembourg Gardens. Here I am wearing my “uniform” and carrying my backpack. I used to cover my head with a scarf on bad hair days. Today the street is under construction and not nearly as romantic as I imagined.

My opening quote says it all. Repetition doesn’t create memories. It’s impossible to relive the past. You can’t recreate the magic because nothing is the same. Memories are better appreciated when they are kept in photo albums.

Stay tuned for future posts about the experiences we enjoyed and new memories we made in Europe this year.

The Coyote Comeback

Coyotes are on the move and coming to your backyard.

When I was growing up, my first encounter with a coyote happened while I watched TV. Like most kids during the fifties, I enjoyed Looney Tunes cartoons. One of my favorite shows starred Wile E. Coyote and Roadrunner.

This cartoon was set in the Southwest American desert. In each episode Wile E. Coyote tried to catch Roadrunner, but was never successful. Wile E. built complex contraptions to try to catch his prey. His contraptions always failed, and Wile E. was the one who is injured. There was no dialogue between the two characters. The Coyote only communicated by holding up a written sign. The Roadrunner always raced by and said, “Beep Beep.” My siblings and I laughed at the slapstick humor.

My parents told me television could influence a person’s thinking. Because of this cartoon, I imagined coyotes only lived in the desert, and weren’t very smart. Both assumptions are false. Today I’ve discovered coyotes are very intelligent. In fact they are one of the most skilled survivors in the animal kingdom. (After all, no matter how many times Wile E. Coyote’s master plans failed, he always lived and returned for another episode.)

In a similar way, coyotes have made a huge comeback in America due to their adaptable behavior. Despite human efforts to eradicate them, coyotes have learned to live in a variety of habitats, from snowy mountain ranges, to big cities. In fact they are now found in all of Florida’s 67 counties.

Recently many coyotes have been sighted in Orlando. Early one morning in April, Herb spotted one walking down the street. He kept a tight hold on Buddy’s leash while the large animal ran to a nearby retention pond. Buddy froze and stared, but did not make a sound. Perhaps he considered Mr. Coyote a distant cousin since they are both members of the dog family.

This spring several coyotes have also been sighted in the park area around Lake Baldwin. My neighbor saw one a few days ago and shot this picture.

Over the past month, there seem to be fewer and fewer rabbits running through the marshy areas around the lake. Coyotes love rabbits but will eat anything, including pets. You can imagine the raised eyebrows when somebody’s cat didn’t come home one night.

It seems like there is nothing we can do to get rid of these unwelcome visitors. The local wildlife commission has no plan to remove them and only advises pet owners to keep their pets inside or on a short leash. Attempts to trap and remove them to other locations have failed to keep the rising population under control.

A dog park is located on the opposite shore of Lake Baldwin. People let their dogs run free on the property because it is fenced. Be on the alert dog owners. Coyotes can swim. There is nothing to stop one from entering the dog park.

All is not lost, friends and neighbors. At least coyotes are very clean animals. They actually bury their excrement. So if you discover a pile of poop on the sidewalk, it was probably Fido’s and left behind by a human.

I have to say I am somewhat alarmed that a pet eating mammal roams through our neighborhood. I’m also concerned that we are expected to accept the idea that “coyotes are here to stay.” Wile E. Coyote has triumphed at last. He may not have outsmarted Roadrunner, but he has outwitted man.